What a week!

Well, this week has kicked my butt.  This is the first week since I switched centers that I wanted to just call it a day and go into retail.  I have one patient in particular that has been having a difficult time and then just when I felt that I was able to get her into a good spot another patient goes off the deep end.  And to add insult to injury this was my first week on call.  So needless to say it was a long, long week and an equally long weekend.  I think Jake took the worst of it though.  This was his first real experience with seeing me completely emotionally drained from work.   I felt so bad for him.  Wednesday night I was a shell, I came home and had nothing left and he had been waiting all day to see me and spend time together and all I wanted to do was lay on the couch and not say a word.  As usual he was so patient with me and did everything he could to try to help, but it was useless, I was done for.  I know that what I do is a gift from God, because there are times that I'm not sure how I get through what I do, but there are other times, like this week when I struggle with my Gift.  When I see the impact it has on my sweet husband and how it prevents me from being available for him, I want to give it back.  But we can't do that.  I know I'm called to do both.  Save the lives of others while being a wife to my husband.   I'm learning as I'm sure most of you have learned as well that serving God takes sacrifice.  I know that I am serving God through the job I do and while this week I felt like I was making sacrifice after sacrifice I can trust that I will be rewarded and blessed beyond imagination for being a good and faithful servant.

Fall

So, I haven't posted in a while and mostly that is because nothing interesting has struck me.  Well, I guess I shouldn't say that, I do have quite a bit on my mind, but this blog isn't the place to work that stuff out.  I know, that sounds a bit cryptic, but not to worry everything is fine.  But back to my original idea for this blog.  Friday at work I was walking a patient back to my office and I felt it....a cool breeze, yes I said cool.  Now,  to most across the country what I felt would not necessarily have been considered a cool breeze, but to me, after months of blast furnace heat, what I felt was a cool breeze.  So, I was hopeful and excited.  Fall is coming, followed by winter and with that comes the holidays.  I'm particularly looking forward to this year.  Last year I was accepted with open arms into Jake's family and this year will just be more of the same.  I'm also looking forward to it because it also brings about a season of get togethers and family time.  A good time to get reconnected. 

Its that time of year when I want to start baking and decorating but its just still a little too hot, but I know its coming.  Its also that time of year when I open the closet and look at the pile of jeans just laying there, mocking me.  However, this year sticking with my new quest to accept what God gave me, I will face those jeans with new resolve.....if that doesn't work, I guess I get to go shopping:)

Little things

In my quest to build a better relationship with my body I'm learning to appreciate the little things in life.  This past holiday weekend Jake and I chose to stick around town even though we were invited out of the heat to cooler weather.  We had been rather busy and we have a couple of busy weekends coming up, so staying home was sounding really good.  And you know what, it was great.  We had Jake's parents over for dinner Saturday night, I was a little nervous, I wanted to make sure what I made was to their liking and even though we go over there all the time, I definitely felt the pressure to be a good hostess.  Well, needless to say Jake's Dad is still talking about the casserole I made so I'd count that as a success.  The rest of the weekend we basically lounged around, watched TV and made plans for the fall.  It was great.  Nothing earth shattering, but wonderful none the less.

I find myself thinking of my evenings by lunch time on any given day.  During the week it is sometimes painful to get out of bed and it has been great this week that Jake has been starting later so we have some time together in the morning. But the evenings are what I live for Monday through Friday.  Again, nothing earth shattering, just TV, chatting, reading, whatever we want to do, it doesn't really matter, its the simple stuff.  Just being, no rush, no fuss, just being.  

Standing in church together Sunday holding hands worshipping the Lord that has seen us through so much and blessed us abundantly.  There really isn't anything like it, and its simple, its a little thing that means so much.  

So, in my quest to appreciate the little things about my body (OK, most of you know I'd have a killer line for that under normal circumstances, but notice that I am showing restraint :) ), its also helping me notice the other little things that make everyday wonderful.
So, I encourage all of you to look around and make note of the little things that put a smile on your face.