Reflection

1 year....I really can't believe it.  Sometimes I think back to when Jake and I met and really thank God that he can work miracles because as some of you know...that's what it took to get us where we are today.  

You see, for those of you that don't know, as much as I wanted to be married and live the "happily ever after" life when Jake walked into my life I FREAKED!  He would say I am being hard on my self by saying that.  But others of you know...its true.  See Jake was raised in a family that gives lots of affirmations and compliments. While  I always dreamed of being adored and found to be beautiful when Jake started telling me how beautiful he thought I was or how much I meant to him I thought he was...well...I thought he was crazy.  I never received those types of affirmations from any other man in my life, so it was weird and awkward to say the least and quite frankly I almost ran the other direction.  Lucky for me, God is good and Jake is patient.  

So hear we are, our 1 year wedding anniversary.  I'm not sure how to sum this year up.  I know some say that the first year of marriage can be the most difficult, and as much as I may want to conform and agree with that, I have to say for us it wasn't.  I'll stop for a moment so everyone can roll their eyes..done..ok, moving on.  We have had ups and downs, but none that caused me to question my decisions or the person that I make those decisions with.  We have been on a learning curve, but we are learning together.  Sure there are times when I have to take a deep breath and remember that its not just about me and this isn't just my home.  Its ours.  But overall we have had a great first year.  Its not been perfect, but I'm not sure either of us expected it to be.  We just wanted to be with each other, grow and build a life.

 

 Mission accomplished.  

For a long time I had made sure that my life wasn't "dependent" on anyone else.  I ensured that I was self sufficient and could do things for myself.  When I met Jake that was truly the hardest adjustment. While I've grown in this area there are still times when fear grips me and tells me that relying on someone doesn't ever end well, and my independence rears its ugly head and I will do something just to show Jake that I can...to show him that I AM CAPABLE.  He just laughs shakes his head and lets me have my moment.  This response reminds me that I'm being silly and that I need to continue to surrender not only to my sweet husband, but to God and the gift he gave me in Jake.  

We are by no means done learning about each other, nor are we done growing, but I think we have gotten off to a good start.  I'm so excited to see what our future holds, this year and the many years to come.  

So, we celebrated all weekend.  I included a few pictures, one of us from the melting pot...awesome experience by the way and then a couple from this morning.  Taken in the truck waiting at Coffee Bean on the way to church.  Not sure why I wanted to take those, but they are fun. 

We are off on to another years journey.  I will keep everyone updated on the happenings in our little corner of the world.